His Lucky Day

Transcript of recorded interview with patient #6Z925Echo

Jack Samuel:

 

“So I’m walking this trail right!

And I’m minding my own business

Taking in some fresh air

And from out of know where there’s like

This voice calling out my name

I’m like ‘what the fuck’

So I stop and take a look around

But I don’t see nobody

 

So I’m like ‘asshole’ and just keep walking

I’m only a few yards down the trail

And there’s that voice again, calling me

I’m like ‘who’s there’

And someone shouts out my name again

So I’m getting pissed now

I shout back ‘you’d better not be fucking with me’

And this voice says “Help Me”

 

I’m official freaked out by now

So I see this branch on the ground

I pick it up, for defence like

And shout ‘where are you’

All I get is “Help me Jack”

I take a look up and down the path

Nobody there so I walk towards the voice

Ten Minutes later I ain’t found nothing

So I’m like ‘fuck this’ and turn around

 

But there’s that voice again

“Help me Jack”

And I’m like ‘Fuck you Asshole’

And that’s when it happened

That’s when this fucker jumped me

Sucker Punched me to the ground

And I woke up in here

By the way where is here, no-ones told me nothing.

 

Doctor, “Well what do you think?”

Scientist, “You’re sure he didn’t see anything”

Doctor, “Does it sound like he saw anything”

Scientist, “What the fuck was he doing out there anyway”

Doctor, “Like he said getting some fresh air”

Scientist, “Where is Subject 0 now”

Doctor, “We got her back in solitary. It was lucky we found them when we did. I guess he wasn’t her type”

Scientist, “Not her type are you saying there’s another one”

Doctor, “I’m afraid so, we found what was left of another male a mile away from where we found him”

Scientist, “What she do to the other one?”

Doctor, “Here are the photos, use your imagination”

Scientist, “Ffuucckk!”

 

Copyright © JRFC July 2019
Image from Pixabay

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